After listening to the king, they went on their way. And behold, the star that they had seen when it rose went before them until it came to rest over the place where the child was.
My dear sweet Pam and I we’re married for 40 years, and God just recently brought her safely home to heaven where Jesus is. A few hours before my dear sweet Pam passed from this life over to the next, the attending ICU physician asked me if I wanted him to place her on life-support. I informed him that she and I had discussed that topic many times in the past, and she had always indicated that she would not want to be resuscitated, or put on life support. So I told him no, that she had suffered enough. While sitting there with her and holding her hand, waiting for the inevitable end, I wondered how I would ever get along without her. I always depended on my dear sweet Pam, much like coal miners depended on canaries, to warn them about the potential danger of poisonous gases deep down inside a mine. This is one reason I wrote the line, “ I feel as though a part of me is missing”, in the poem below. For 40 years, God used my dear sweet Pam, the star of my life, to help direct my course, much like He used the Star of Bethlehem, referenced in the Bible verse above, to guide the Magi to the place where the baby Jesus was. God had always used my dear sweet Pam to fulfill the promises He made in Jeremiah 29:11 which says, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” So how was God going to accomplish this moving forward, I wondered? God being God, answered this question in an awesome and mighty way! I played several songs during the last half hour of my dear wife’s life on this earth. The first song that played, and I don’t even know how it got on my cell phone, was “Earth Has No Sorrow Heaven Can’t Heal”. The words in that song were so comforting to me. I then played a random selection of songs that I had written, the last one of which was entitled, “Have Mercy”, which would be the last song my dear sweet Pam would hear while still on this earth. I wrote this song many years ago, which I thought was about my own Christian walk upon this earth, and my future entrance into heaven. Little did I know back then when I wrote this song, that it would be the song that I would imagine my dear sweet Pam singing, about her walk and her ascension into heaven. I would also like for you to know, that this song ended at exactly 7:00 PM that Sunday night and that was also the exact time, my dear sweet Pam crossed from this life over into heaven. That was God’s way of letting me know, that Pam’s time had come, and that no amount of life-support could have changed that. It was also the exact time that the Shekinah Glory of God came down and filled that ICU. Jesus not only lifted my dear sweet Pam up into heaven, but he also lifted me up as well, and sat Himself down fully upon the throne of my life. That was the most beautiful experience I have ever had, and I remember voluntarily saying, “Jesus Christ is Lord”, and my life has not been the same since. I now know that it will be the Holy Spirit of God who indwells my heart, that will guide and direct my course going forward. He will take me to where Jesus and my dear sweet Pam are! My dear, sweet Pam, had always exemplified the admonition of God as to how godly wives should live their lives, as written in 1 Peter 3:1-6. She had both an outer beauty and an inner beauty. Use me going forward dear Lord, while life remains. Praise the holy name of Jesus! God is good!
Yesterday was your memorial service,
And I awoke not knowing if my tears.
Were caused by blessings from God above,
Or a longing for my wife of forty years.
I feel as though a part of me is missing,
You were always my reason for living.
You always kept me on course like a star,
By your gentle ways and a love so giving.
Today God is helping me to understand,
And I’m beginning to get more excited.
One glad day in God’s timing,
Our soul’s will be reunited.
Until that day when we meet in heaven,
Jesus will help me navigate life’s turns and twists.
I’ll trust Him to get me to where you are,
Until then just know you are sorely missed.
Ethan W. Moses